Self-Love = Self-Worth

Self-love seems like a catch phrase these days especially this time of year if you are single and Valentine’s Day is just days away. But in reality, self-love is the idea of making your self-worth a priority whether single, in a relationship, married, whatever your situation may be. It’s about creating space to get out of your head and open yourself up to endless possibilities. The key here is to raise your energy to attract equally aligned energetic opportunities, relationships, and experiences to flow your way.

If I think back not even that long ago, there was a period when I felt I was constantly being hit with one bad thing after another. I was stuck in this constant negative state of mind just kinda expecting something else to go wrong. And you know what, it did. I was perpetuating my own reality by staying in this low vibe thought pattern. My energy was attracting that same level of low energy conflict to keep showing up. Although, I try to look at the silver lining in any situation and make the best of it I still couldn’t seem to break the cycle. It wasn’t until I decided to consciously make the choice each and every day to choose love first and proactively push the negative thoughts aside. If I find myself going back to the old thought patterns, I acknowledge the feeling but then immediately follow it up by recognizing a blessing and being grateful. Gratitude can almost instantly shift your mood in any moment.

The first step to self-love is gratitude. It’s about celebrating all the blessings you currently have in this present moment but taking it a step further.  Treating yourself to something you wouldn’t normally think to do or would normally only expect someone else to do for you.

Give yourself permission to awaken that feeling of excitement all on your own, whether single or attached…why wait? Let’s face it even if you have a partner sometimes you build up super high expectations of what you want him/her to do for you, and then end up disappointed. The act of self-love is something you can do for yourself at any time and release the high expectations. So, if you are single, create that vibration of loving energy opening up its flow to you. And, if attached, release those expectations allowing your partner to surprise you in his/her own way which leaves you open to the unexpected. Allow yourself to be caught off guard instead of controlling the outcome.

Another way of looking at this is to think about what you might want someone to do for you and actually do that very thing for someone special. Instead of waiting for it to happen, you can recreate it for someone else and surround yourself with the feeling of that gesture. This will set the tone of how you want to be treated keeping you open to attracting similar experiences. The goal again is to raise your vibration, surround yourself with the feeling of having what you want and be open to receive.

Try it! Here are some thought starters to get you going:

Create a spa-like experience at home. I don’t mean a typical bath here. Go all out. Get luxurious bath salts, scented oils (essential oils can evoke different emotions depending on the scent, play around and see what you like best), light some candles, pour yourself a glass of wine or some tea, play relaxing meditative music and just soak it all in! Don’t skimp on yourself get all the good stuff. You’ll be addicted in no time. I just recently started doing this. I was never really a bath person but O.M.G. I’ve really been missing out. It’s amazing what a little (or a lot) of pampering can do for your psyche.

Make a fancy dinner or order from a special restaurant. If you've been meaning to test out your cooking skills by preparing an exotic meal but have been waiting for a special occasion or someone special to share it with. Well, now is the time! Why not treat yourself and if it doesn’t come out exactly how you wanted, oh well, consider it practice. If you are not into cooking, then order from a restaurant that’s been on your list of spots to check out. Set the table, get out the good plates and silverware and don’t forget the dessert!!

Pop the bubbly! Usually champagne is reserved for holidays or celebrations, well who said you can’t enjoy a glass of champagne in the middle of the week or on a random night to celebrate getting all your laundry done or cleaning out your closet. That calls for major celebration!! Want even more fun? Get some chocolate covered strawberries (my favorite!!!) to accompany your mini celebration. Keep the party going and invite some friends over for brunch the next day using the leftover champagne for mimosas. You can’t go wrong!

Make yourself a care package. Remember how it felt to get a care package from home when you were miles away at college? I used to love those!! The idea is not to go overboard by doing all kinds of shopping, then packing it all up just to mail it to yourself. Keep it simple. Maybe it’s a pre-made gift package from your fave online store with a bunch of different samples which still makes it fun to open but you are not the one actually putting it all together. Or, get a beautiful bouquet of flowers delivered to you at home. This is a step up from just picking up a $5 bunch from the grocery store. Plus, beats having to juggle all your groceries and trying not to crush the flowers. Even if you feel strange about doing this, do it anyway. Push yourself out of your comfort zone and stop waiting for someone else to make you feel special.

Dress up. Whether you work from home or commute to an outside location, try to look your best a couple of times a week. If you already do this every day, well you are a rock star! But for those that feel stuck in the same routine day in and day out, mix things up by dressing your best, doing your hair, treat yourself to a mani/pedi and get all dolled up from head to toe. When you feel your best, you exude more confidence and tend to perform daily tasks with a higher level of pride. It’s just an all-around great feeling that benefits not only you but those around you by creating a sense of inspiration.

Do you have other ideas or a spin on any of the above? Please share in comments below! I’m always up to try something new and get inspiration from others.

Happy Love Month!